A year ago!

A year ago yesterday is when it was confirmed that I had cancer! WOW what a year! Looking back now, how fast it really went. Didn't seem that way at the time. Yesterday, was the BIG snow. I spent the day hanging with Nancy and Jaxon. Watching the weather about the snow, watching the snow, taking pictures and texting about the snow, shoveling the snow, playing in the snow. SNOW, SNOW, SNOW!!!! On and off throughout the day I tried to find parallel, correlation, or meaning to the day. Something to signify that importance of the day for me. And well, I just really couldn't! It was a totally different day, with new trials and tribulations, new highs and lows, a new day...a year later. This is what a took away from it. It is a new year and it doesn't have to be a year of anniversaries of last year. It is a year about NEW things! It will bring its good and its bad, but it is a NEW year. So last year was the year of CANCER and this year, well we will have to wait and see! But in the meantime we will move forward and have as much FUN as we can!!!!!

Treatment

Hello all, well anyone who might still be reading my blog. I am actually sitting in treatment at this very moment. I am using our fancy new laptop. My results from the ECHO and DEXA tests were normal. I saw the Dr. today and she didn't have much to say. All is going well. No news is good news....right??? It is always interesting to sit here and listen to everyone, although it is a bit quiet today. I don't have to have blood work for 9 weeks and I think at that time they will do another Cancer Antigen test. It is hard to believe it has been a year since this fight began. I am so hoping and looking forward to a year of traveling and activity. We have a trip planned to Tulsa soon and then Puerto Vallarta after that! Its time to get back out there and LIVE!

The New Year

We have entered 2011. I am feeling good. Continued joint pain and HOT flashes but otherwise doing well. I just had a couple of test this week. An ECHO to see if my heart is tolerating the Herceptin and a DEXA bone density test to see how my bones are handling the forced menopause.

It is sad to go get treatment and to see all the women who have just began their journey with breast cancer. I think there were 8 of us in the infusion area at my last treatment. I believe I was the furthest along. Everyone looked so bald and so sick. I felt like I was just dropping in having a little down time in my day and they were so in the middle of all the hell.

Jen is amazing (she told me to write that) and Jaxon is .... well still being Jaxon. Today he was doing a little puzzle on his I phone and I told him I would give him $5 dollars if he could tell me who the picture was. He said "Mona Lisa", I gave him $5!

Now what?

This blog was started to keep everyone posted as I progressed through my journey with cancer. It has served its purpose, well at least it has given me a place to post and organize my thoughts. I guess by definition I am cancer free. The cancer was removed with my surgery, no cancer in the lymph nodes. I am so happy that I am finally through with chemotherapy and the surgeries are past me. It does not appear that I am having any major side effects from my Herceptin or Arimidex. I do have some random joint pain but I am not sure if I can blame it on either of those medicines. Oh and the hot flashes, well that's something I knew was going to happen.

Now it is time for me to get back to normal, well my new normal, as I like to call it. I don't think things can ever be the same. But really no matter what is going on in life things move forward and things change. I am looking forward to next year and I am hopeful that it will be full of great things........but at the same time I am waiting for the cancer to come back or be somewhere else. I am sure this has to be normal and I am also sure these fears will lessen as more time goes by. In the meantime, I will move forward, cautiously optimistic.

Where to start....

I last posted pictures of my drains. At that time I was feeling great, well as good as could be expected following a major surgery. The next week I started going back to the gym, doing some minor chores around the house, and even got one of my drains out. I decided that since my dad is ill I should take the opportunity of some downtime and go visit him in Poplar Bluff.

Jaxon and I loaded up on Thursday Nov. 11th and headed to Poplar Bluff. The next day I woke up not feeling very good. I tried to push through the day but just seemed to be getting worse. I finally took my temp. around 5 p.m. and found I was running a 101 temp. Not good when you have just had surgery and have a tube hanging out of your body.

I ended up in Urgent Care with chills, nausea, fever and severe pain along my left side. The Dr. felt I needed to be admitted to the hospital but thought I was safe to get back to Springfield. By that time I couldn't stand up without having ringing in my ears and feeling faint. My friend Lisa saved to day and drove me back to Springfield. I stayed the night at my house but Saturday was not feeling any better so I headed to the Emergency Room.

I was finally seen by the surgeon on call who confirmed that I had an infection but did not feel I had an infection in my wound!?!?!?!?! He did feel that I needed to start IV antibiotics and admitted me into the hospital. After only 2 rounds of IV antibiotics the pain in my side finally started to decrease. My fever broke on Sunday and things began to slowly get better. My physician finally saw me on Monday morning and took a sample from my drain tube to test for infection (GO FIGURE!!). It came back on Tuesday as a staph infection. Yes that is correct, staph infection in the area of my wound. Fortunately by then I was feeling much better and was ready to go home. I was released with a heavy dose of oral antibiotics that I was to take for 10 days.

When I got home (Tues 16th) I realized I didn't feel as good as I thought. I still had some soreness, my arm movement had regressed secondary to not using it for 4 days and I was scared to death that some germ was going to invade my drain tube again.

No rest for the weary, I was at the hospital on Friday Nov 19th starting my first round of Herceptin. As mentioned before, this is an infused medicine but without the common side effects associated with chemotherapy. I did have the chills that night and was tired the next day but I am not sure if this was associated with the treatment or not. Will have to wait and see what happens the next time around (Dec. 10th).

The next week flew by with the Thanksgiving holiday. I did get my other drain out on Nov. 22nd. Today I returned to work. I had computer training all day which I think was a nice transition back to work. Tomorrow will be my first day to see patients.

I have had a really hard time with the thought of going back to work this week. I did not feel ready, it did not seem that I really had enough time off. This was supposed to be my time to heal from all the !@#$ I have been through all year. Some much deserved ME time. It just didn't seem possible that it was already time to go back to work. This morning I started reviewing the last month that I have had off and realized that in the last 27 days, I only spent 6 of them truly by myself. The light bulb went off, no wonder I felt like I had no ME time...... I really didn't. So I guess ME time wasn't meant to be and I have resolved it is time to get back to "normal"........Well I am not sure things will ever be normal but I will continue to move forward. Is there really any other choice!?!?!!

Drain tubes!!!

The first picture is the drain coming out of my side. It is held in at the skin with a stitch. The other 2 pictures is were the tubes drain into. One for each side. Have to drain 2-3 times a day and record the amount of drainage.

Pathology report confirmed

Saw the Dr. this morning. He confirmed the good news of the pathology report. 12 cancer free lymph nodes, no cancer in the right breast or the ovaries and clean margins around the tumor that was left in the left breast. All very good news.

He seemed satisfied with the way everything looked. I go back to see him on Monday. He wants to get the drains out as soon as possible but I have to get down to draining about 30 cc (on each side) before he will take out the drains. Yesterday I drained 275 cc on the left and 75 cc on the right. He is hoping to get the one out on the left by Monday.

I have an appointment to see P.T. next Tuesday. I am going to learn some techniques to decrease my risk of getting lymphadema. I will also get a sleeve as a preventative measure to be used when traveling.